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janissogaly

by Simon Aulman

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janissogaly 40:00
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Things have been going downhill a bit over the last few things, so I'm going to need a rejig and set off in a slightly different direction - there's 99 different "sounds" on that cheap placky keyboard and I only ever use piano #1.

...................

Well yes thank you, my knee is slowly getting better - no idea if it will ever get back to 100% okay - from what I know about these things, the healing can take between 3 and 12 months - 3 to 12 months of taking things very easy, I'm allowed small walks across town, but no strenuous exercises, no bendings and squattings, I'm not allowed to run/jog (as if) or run upstairs (impossible anyway, too painful) or jump up and down (jeeezus) or do rock climbing (disaster - my life is over).

I'll be a bit more open about how it happened - I got drunk just before Christmas and yes I fell down the stairs while drunk, and at the time I just got up like all drunks do and I just carried on and thought I'd got away with it - it was only when I'd sobered up and started living life normally that it all got really painful and I realised I had a big problem.

It means I've hit that age - or at least one of those ages. I only have to look around at my peers to see how we're all treading water as we're washed closer and closer to the waterfall's long drop to chaos and oblivion. One of my exes, more than ten years younger than me and if you met her you'd think she was very healthy, can only climb stairs very slowly, another friend, also younger than me, tripped over the ledge under his patio doors and broke both knees and will have to walk using crutches forevermore.

And so on. I'm bumping into people my own age as they tell me about the panic alarms they have at home, or sometimes even carry with them. I've been sober for long enough now, and I eat enough strong dark chocolate, that life is starting to seem hilarious again - to my mother's (only) credit, she did go laughing all the way to her body-bag - I carried the sound of her laughter in my head even as the two nice lady undertakers apologetically carried her out of her flat - and why did they apologise ? - it wasn't as though it was their mess that was left behind, it was my mother's - even after the end she still had people apologising for her own lapses - charisma, I'll give her that, she had it by the ton - when your body starts to collapse it's time to exercise your charisma muscles and sweep the world's po-faced disapproval aside.

recorded this morning, painting/splashings this morning

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released January 4, 2024

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Simon Aulman Southampton, UK

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